Old dogs, new tricks? Online dating and older adults

This paper reports the findings of semi-structured qualitative interviews with 30 older adults (aged 60 – 76 years), all of whom used online dating websites to find new romantic partnerships. The interviews were conducted using four different interview methods: (1) face-to-face and (2) telephone interviews and (3) email and (4) instant messaging, and have been described previously (see Malta 2009). Most studies of online romantic relationships use younger sample populations making it difficult to generalize to older adults (see for instance, Donn and Sherman 2002) and are usually situated within the psychological literature (for example, Whitty and Gavin 2001). This study describes the phenomenon amongst seniors and positions it within a sociological framework. We chart the progression of older adult romantic relationships, describing the participants’ reasons and motivations for going online to look for romantic partners, followed by the way these romances unfold and how the online environment structures their development through various predetermined stages: the posting of personal profiles, the initial contact ('kisses' and 'winks'), emails, phone contact, face-to-face meeting, and finally sex. The majority of these online-initiated relationships followed this very structured pattern of progression, with only minor variations. We argue that online dating affords older adults the opportunity to shop around for their perfect match – discarding those who do not suit – simply because of the large number of possible partners available online; a possibility not available through offline means. We further argue that using an online dating website provides a particular structure that fosters the development of a new romance and causes it to unfold through a standardized process that is difficult to circumvent.